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Ah, coffee, that wonderful warm start-of-the-day beverage. I have such a love/hate relationship with it. It has so may pros and cons.

Pros:
1. I can help wake you up.
2. It can help with a sore throat.
3. The heat can help with a stuffed up head.
4. It helps with asthma problems.
5. It’s a tasty beverage, that goes particularly well with sweets.
6. It can help with mental focus.
7. A hot cup of coffee in a mug is two weapons in one. (I’ve mentioned my favorite weapon here before, yes?)

Cons:
1. It can keep you awake when you would rather sleep.
2. It can make your hands very unsteady.
3. It can give you an acid belly/disagree with your system.
4. It can take a normal stress reaction and make it go through the roof. Hello panic attack.
5. It can help you focus *way too much*. Must…Finish…Project!

and the one I’d totally forgotten about until Saturday:
6. It makes me paranoid.

Yep. Did you know that everyone was ignoring me on Saturday? No? How about the fact that my co-workers are all going to be angry with me for calling in sick on Saturday and I’ll ‘get in trouble’ for doing so? Sigh. I called in sick because of the whole coughing/sneezing/runny nose/having trouble breathing problem that I drank the coffee for in the first place.

Note to self: One cup is okay. Two cups is pushing it these days. Three cups is right out. You haven’t worked graveyard shift in thirteen years, and you are getting more sensitive as you get older. Don’t be a paranoid dork. Yes. Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you, but seriously…

So drink tea instead!

(So, my friends have a shoulder cat. That’s me that she’s resting on.)

So, remember my hope that 2010 would be better than 2009?

Yeah. Not so much.

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So, I gather that the few of you who still pop by here have noticed that I haven’t posted much lately. Well, here’s how the last week has gone.

Welcome to my roller coaster.

Tuesday last week, after having returned home from Kauai late the night before, I went to get my pregnancy test for this go around. Then…I did stuff around the house.

Wednesday morning I called in for my results. There was a long pause and then the nurse informed me that my test had come back positive.

Me: “Are you sure?”
Her: “Yes. Your HcG level is 23. *starts to list off a bunch of don’ts that basically bounce off of my brain*”
And then I was told to get another blood test the next day. At this point I was very cautiously optimistic, but trying not to get my hopes up. Yes. This was my first positive pregnancy test in nearly six years of trying.

Thursday brought with it another blood test. This time they were testing both for HcG and Progesterone (though how they could gauge that second one when they have me taking Progesterone, I’m not sure. Whatever.)

Friday morning I called in for my new results, and was informed that my HcG level had only gone up three to 26, and it’s supposed to have at least doubled by that point. Obviously, another test was in order. My arms were not pleased with this news.

Friday night I went to see New Moon. This improved my mood considerably.

Saturday morning I went in for the next blood test, and boy howdy that was painful. Then I went to spend the weekend with friends watching Supernatural (I’m finally in Season 5!) and organizing their DVD collection. That last part should give you an idea of the state of my nerves. They were totally shot. But now Catslyn and Eideann have their movies in alphabetical order.

Monday morning, bright and early, I called in to get the results of the third test. I was told to call back at noon as the results were not in yet. So, I did what anyone else in my situation would have done. I went back to sleep. At noon (which is when I leave for work, by the way) I called in once more for the results, only to discover that my HcG levels were now going down. The nurse stated that she would talk to the doctor and get back to me. When we finally connected (after I’d spent an hour working on the Info desk and not bursting into tears) it was determined that I get to to yet another blood test when I get back from Thanksgiving vacation. They want to make sure that the levels go back to normal, apparently.

So, there you are. My week-long roller coaster. At this point I’m low on actual data, but I gather that I was pregnant for a very short time. I guess this means that It’s actually possible. The Shingles probably didn’t help things. It hasn’t completely gone away yet, by the way. At least it doesn’t hurt anymore.

Okay. Enough with the sadness. Check out this 1967 Mustang that I found.

It turns out that there is actually a classic car shop not far from me. I’m doomed.

On Monday I went to work.

Tuesday, I took the day off. I got an IUI and discovered that I can nap in my car quite effectively. Except for the whole “dreaming that you’re driving” problem. (I dreamed that I was trying to get a stray dog to get into my car. The street was a busy one,m but he just wanted to frisk about. Weird.) It turned out to be very good that I took Tuesday off. Let’s just say that I was in a certain amount of pain and leave it at that.

Wednesday found me wondering what might possibly be giving me hives.

Thursday found me wondering why my rash was hurting and calling the advice nursed.

And today (Friday) I find that I do not have hives…

I have Shingles.

Shingles, for Heaven’s sake. When I can’t take much in the way of painkiller. (Though the Doc I saw tried to offer me some Vicodin. Ew. Can’t take that for two reasons…)

And my vacation starts on Wednesday.

Grumble.

I’m going to give up and go to sleep now. Night all.

Another reason to want to win the lottery: A 1967 Mercury Cougar.

Howdy folks. Remember the time that I set the kitchen on fire?

Yeah?

Well, I’d think that said Kitchen was out for revenge if I didn’t know that I am totally accident prone. You see, on Saturday I made pizza. (I know. I cooked. Don’t be too shocked.) And as I was taking the pizza out of the oven a couple of things happened at once. I burned my left arm on the oven door and my oven mitt stopped being oven-y enough. Ouch! No harm no foul, don’t worry.

Okay. Maybe a bit of harm, but nothing big. Just a red mark on my arm, which went really nicely with the bruise I got walking into a sticky-out bit of moulding that they have on the columns at work the other day. Don’t say that I can’t accessorize. (Also? What is with that design feature? Anyone?)

And that was it until Sunday evening, at which point I ventured into the kitchen to get a bottle of water to go with my tasty french toast. (Yes. Two days of cooking. A record?) Now, we keep our not-yet-refrigerated water in the space between the fridge and the start of the cabinets. I leaned over to grab a bottle from its spot, and in standing up managed to slam the top of my head into the pointy bit on the corner of the kitchen counter. Really hard. I must have made some really terrible noise, ’cause the next thing I knew, Koshvader was standing next to me demanding to know what was wrong. Then, of course, the phone started ringing, but we ignored it. I think I might have been too busy swearing. Not sure. Wow that hurt. But I think my low blood pressure finally came in handy for something, as I barely bled at all. And upon closer inspection, the *very* sharp corner of the counter is now slightly chipped. Ha! Skull: 1, Counter: 0. Downside? Now that it is a couple of days later, my head itches right where the cut is. Ah well. At least that means it’s healing, right?

For the record: So far this week I’ve managed to bang my knee a couple of times and had a cat leap into my lap, with claws extended. I’m going with the accident-prone thing rather than the Revenge of My Kitchen. Votes?

I’m sorry, but someone had to say it.

Hot Dogs are Not food! They are a food-like substance….that smells bad.

There. I’m glad to finally get that off of my chest.

Now to lighten the mood I offer you: Back to the Future 2: Electric Boogaloo . (Obviously, this is the heart-warming story of time travel…and break dancing.)

To round off this post I offer you all some actual news: I still have teeth. The only dental work I need, as it turns out, is to fix one of my pre-existing fillings. *whew* Also? I got a new toothbrush. This is actually the metric that I use to determine if a new dentist is a “real” dentist. My new dentist has passed the test. The gold star next to the check mark on their chart is due to the dental hygienist who gave me all sorts of tooth-related information while she worked. It was like being in the middle of a documentary, and I love a good documentary.

Analysis: I’m keeping them.

So…I had an appointment today with my lead doctor at the Infertility clinic.

The good news: He’s not worried by my cyst, so we’re going to just move on to the next thing next month.

The Bad (but also good) news: The next thing is those shots in the belly. Eek!

In other news, the Universe seems to be telling me to wear skirts more often. I am having no luck with the hunting for new pants thing. I’ve been wanting to buy some girl jeans (normally I just wear 501s. Hey. They fit.) but I just can’t seem to find a pair that please me. On the other hand, I saw all kinds of pretty skirts (like this one and this one) during my shopping trip. For the record, this skirt obsession is not a new thing. And yes. I wore a skirt to work today.

Oh! And if you wish to look at more pics of Koshvader’s jewelry, go here.

(Without his help, my buttons bracelets would escape…)

I’ve been to two doctor’s appointments this week, and this is what I have learned.

– Apparently, sleeping enough, eating right, managing your stress, etc. is the cure for a whole lot of things. Like…hand tremors.
– My new doctor actually has a sense of humor and an engaging personality. Weird. I’m so keeping her.
– Getting X-rays may not be such a good idea if you’re actively trying to deal with fertility issues. I’m thinking that a massage will go a long way to helping my back problems. Yep. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
– The pain in my shoulder? The same old tendinitis I’ve had for years. Sigh.
– My cyst has gotten bigger. Again.

So, there you have it. My back hurts, but i’ll just deal with it until I can afford a good massage. My hand tremors *could* be due to some liver issue (so we’re testing it) but it’s more likely to be my nerves/caffeine use/lack of sleep/stress. I’m ignoring my shoulder. And it looks like I may have a date with a bit of surgery if my cyst doesn’t randomly go away by the end of my cycle. This freaks me out to no end, let me tell you.

Hey. At least I’ve been working on button bracelets. More on that once I finally write up the results. In the meantime, I wish you all a relaxing rest of the week.

Those of you who know me are probably aware that I hate April Fool’s Day. I am not the fan. At all. In fact, if at all possible, I take the day off and hide at home. Not under the covers, but still, you get the idea. Perhaps it’s merely that I can’t take a joke/don’t know when people are just teasing me/I’m sensitive. (Did you know that April 1 used to be New Year’s Day? When the New Year was moved to January, folks who still celebrated the New Year in April were called “April Fools” and folks played tricks on them. Sounds like peer pressure to conform to societal norms, if you ask me. Yes…I love Chase’s Calendar of Events. It has all sorts of info. like that.)

Anyway, today, against my better judgment, I left the house. I had a Doctor’s appointment to go to anyway, and they needed me to work my usual week 2 late shift.

Well, I went in to have my cyst looked at, and not only was it still there, but it has gotten bigger. So, they’re putting me on Birth Control Pills in hopes that this will help combat said cyst. Argh. No only am I not starting the next medication, still, but now I have to deal with a whole new kind of Birth Control Pills for a cycle.

Birth Control Pills. Bleh. This is not a sort of medication that I historically react well to. Big surprise, yeah? The last kind I tried caused me to barely sleep for a week. You can see why I might be leery about the whole thing. On the one hand, still no needles to deal with, but on the other hand a medication that will stop me getting pregnant. Sigh. It’s a bit frustrating, you know?

After this morning’s disappointment, I had some lunch, finished my book (A Quick Bite by Lynsay Sands), and started work. I actually managed to get quite a bit done before lunch, in spite of the vertigo that has been plaguing me on and off for the last week.

And then…I went to get some dinner. At some point while I was eating, I realized that a spot was missing from my vision. By the time I managed to finish and get out of there, the migraine precursor was pulsating where most of my left eye’s vision usually was. Also, I was shaking for some weird reason. I made it back to work just fine, but by the time I made it back to my desk, the vertigo had returned. Also? I felt sort of…fizzy. Like I had somehow become carbonated. Which is weird twice, as I don’t even drink soda anymore.

As you can imagine, all of this was rather worrying. Earlier in the day I had decided that I must have some sort of ear infection, but I’d hoped to make an appointment for tomorrow after a good night’s sleep and some Benadryl. No such luck. Luckily, the migraine precursors went away by the time my co-workers dragged me across the street to the ER. (I sometimes get the precursors from dehydration. Thankfully, this was one of those times. Either that, or my body was just too darn confused. My head did start to hurt and whole “spacey” feeling stuck around for a while. Go figure.)

I ended up sitting on a bed in the ER hallway, as they were out of rooms, for two hours. For most of that time I was actually too annoyed at the situation to even read. I hate going to the ER. I had stuff to do. You know the Type-A drill. Well, It turns out that I have an inner ear viral infection. Ugh. So the nice (and speedy) Doctor that examined me gave me something for the vertigo (an anti-histamine, as it happens) and sent me on my way. Good thing, too, as Koshvader hates hospitals even more than I do, and he’d come all the way from the other side of the Bay to be with me in People Screaming Land.

Now I’m sitting on my bed with my laptop in my lap, and I can’t help but think that I should have just stayed home today. The cats agree with me. Ah, well. I’ve taken my pills like a good girl. It’s time for some of that sleep stuff.

Next year, I’m taking the day off.

So, today was the day. I went to see the Infertility specialist…and he had a few interesting things to say.

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